That soul sucking, mind numbing retail Job...

The nearly mind numbing job I had was in the mall.Now before I drop names - I believe at the time I didn't value service. Service is a job and can be a career. Better yet it touches nearly every aspect of businesses. Now that my disclaimer is out there:I decided to go and work for Claire's.I was desperate and needed the money. I wasn't sure what else to do. Going back to school was often a thought, but I didn't want to drown myself deeper into debt. The job was mind numbing because it had way too much of a routine. The only changes were moving signs around and updating inventory.I did enjoy the jewelry though. And then I had an idea.Maybe I could become a designer for the jewelry they make!!I went searching online only to come up short. No leads and more mind numbing tasks. I can't like though - I learned how to up-sell with add ons and learned things like "units per transaction".I had a friend/relative whom was younger and couldn't understand why I didn't enjoy my job. She would ask every week and my answer was always the same- looking back I believe it wasn't engaging enough. Sure I could talk to people, convince them to go ahead and pierce their ears - but I didn't get to engage in creative pursuits with my mind and hands.After a year of this retail job - and other experiences between 0 like being a preschool teacher, working at the gym at the front desk at the bouji-est place ever - I landed on what I thought was a lead for a my first experience in the design world.The hours were full-time so that was my ticket out to leave Clair's and work in the design industry - or so I thought.After three weeks of working there, I showed up to work and received notice that I could report back home. I was outside the office, it was snowing outside and I got a phone call from the recruiter saying, "There's no work for you today, they'll call you when the job picks back up." What a blow in the face!I drove back home, in disbelief and told my mom what had happened.Pride wouldn't let me go back to Clair's and besides, I had already put in my resignation letter. There was no way I was going to beg for that job back!(Smh) Kids don't ever do that! Swallow your pride and go back! For four months I was without a job.I was depressed.and Stressed because I had to pay my bills.Like a fool I put them on my credit card.I didn't know any better.I finally decided to try something outside of design.I applied to work as a home health aide. This job wasn't so bad. It was the people I worked with that made my life miserable. People didn't hold their end of responsibility.People would call out of work - and you couldn't leave until you had a replacement. After three months of working there I dropped down to a part time position so that I could motivate myself to look for something else. I didn't want to get comfortable. Within two months of dropping part time I found something else. I was going to be working at the bank! I vowed to myself I wouldn't go back to retail. (But banking is similar - just no folding of clothes).t's here that I learned a great deal about finances. And began to toy around with the idea of hand lettering and calligraphy once again. (I took course electives while in college).After six months - I got tired of being at the bank. Working on Saturdays was an inconvenience at the time because I was heavily involved in several ministries in my church.I took my one week vacation and flew out to California. When I got back I was determined to get into design. I started with applying internally for a graphic design position. When I was turned down for that, I told everyone that I was a designer. And eventually my cousin helped me land and interview with a packaging design company. Fast forward 2.5 years later and it brings you to here - present day.There are still struggles I face at my day job but overall its been great. But now I'm seeking for a bit more. I feel compelled to do something with my design skills. I believe that m design skills are a gift from God. and you know, for the longest time I didn't understand that. I thought my purpose had to be this thing that I had to sweat for - blood and tears. But a light bulb went off this week. My talent for art is a gift from God. Its free, I need to use it to glorify him.This is my new challenge.  One that's been knocking on my door for sometime.This is what I am searching for. How to implement.I feel really compelled - called even (actually its really like a strong urge and desire) to go to the missions trip from my church. I need to design things that matter. Remember I spoke to you about a friend whom I had a conversation with? Well yea she mentioned I needed to travel to be inspired. That my lack of inspiration is whats keeping me from moving forward, and designing things that people need and that aren't planned for obsolescence.So now I feel the need to go to Haiti sooner. I have a trip in progress for December 2017- but maybe this July is the answer. Should I get selected to go, I'd have to raise $1500.00 to cover my funds. Now where does one go to raise funds like that in such a short amount of time?