No internet for a week and half

I didn't consume for a week and a half. No phone, no internet, no worries about bills or work or coworkers – non of that. For a week and a half.

Recently I went on a missions trip to Haiti and I was privileged to go and see the area in which my mom grew up.

Many people asked if I was culture shocked – but I didn't go with much expectations. I heard stories from not having access to any water or food, I've heard stories about how crazy the heat is, and how the natives are. I was able to live amounts the people for a week and a day but knowing that I would go back home played a part in the missions service trip.

The enjoyed not having to think of bills, work, or getting requests from people. I was in Haiti serving others full time but let's not make things all peachy. There were moments of frustration and annoyance but they passed daily quickly.

The heat got to me and had me drained and dehydrated so through the rest of the week I was checking my blood pressure. Turns out that it was significantly high majority of the week.

I have to make a doctors appointment and take my health much more seriously if I don't want any permanent issues.

Clean Water in 2017

So this missions trip for me was all about experiencing Haiti from a service standpoint. Yet it’s becoming more than that. If there is one thing I hear over and over again, it’s “do not drink the water”.
Often you hear this from country to country – especially when traveling overseas and in poorer countries.
But why is it that in the 21-century clean water isn’t prevalent everywhere?
Since going to school and studying industrial design, accumulating debt because “it’s an investment” and having a belief that I can change the world through design, I figured I can start with figuring out the best way to get clean water.
I really want to design to improve people’s lives. I understand that having a business requires making a profit – even if its just to sustain the business.
So where does one start?
I can see where a missions trip can have good intentions but we have to bring bottles of water with us. What happens to the waste we’ve brought and accumulated? If there was a better way to help filter water locally – so that foreigners could drink, and not get sick – this would eliminate costs for the non-profit as well as waste added to Haiti’s landfill.

Too Good To Be True

This was an email I wrote to Jonathan Feilds. Pretty much gushing my feels over the interwebs:
Time and time again I come back to this drafted email wanting to reach out and for some reason I never hit send. Instead, I erase what I previously had typed up on the screen and start over. Your podcast is very inspiring. Hearing from people that have overcome the difficulty and struggle when it comes to creativity, spirituality, and belief, finances, passion, and work.
This Friday, I leave for a missions trip to Haiti. It’s where my parents were born. I was scheduled to go on a sightseeing excursion in December, yet someone decided to encourage me to apply for the missions team – even though they weren’t accepting any more applications. Admittedly, I didn’t want my first visit to be of one where I would be exposed to the poverty my mom and grandmother grew up in. I wanted to see the beautiful island people spoke so highly of.
At some point, I realized this would be a selfish act. I followed through with the application and went to the first meeting that was held in regards to the missions. The person that invited me to apply and even the meeting ended up deciding they weren’t ready to go. They gave up their seat.
Our team consists of Doctors, Nurses, teachers and me. By formal trade, I am a designer and artist. Yet on this trip, it’s my job to document. The story the process, the adventure even of going to do the great work of feeding people, doing outreach, teaching and showing and extending love.
I know my struggle is far different from those around me. And we shouldn’t compare.
I’ve come to realize that networking is important. Getting out of your comfort zone is important. Reaching out is important. And most of all a closed mouth doesn’t get fed. Success – however one chooses to define it – is determined by the individual.
As a first generation born American in my family, I thought, ” go to school, get a good job pay the bills, get married and have kids and lead a successful life”.
Man, was I wrong!
I write all this to ask one question – where does the shift in mindset need to change? It all sounds too good to be true. Yet you’ve interviewed many people, and they seem to be living full lives.
I don’t know what I am hoping to hear back – or if you will even have the time to reply.
Designer in distress,
Keshna Donia Thermitus

Half Assed Work

Half-assed work. Is it better to not be done at all or is it better that you have a starting point somewhere to improve and learn from?

The days are fast approaching to my missions trip, I am looking forward to having stories to share. Stories about my experience and stories of the people I meet there.

So that means I won’t have immediate access to internet and wifi for a good two weeks.

TWO WEEKS! First world problems yeah?

I’ve debated writing in advance and sharing posts over the next two weeks but I don’t want it to be shitty and half-assed- Like the post I did yesterday.

I’ve managed to show up for 298 days as of today. I would hate to break my streak. But breaking my streak would mean that I don’t publish. I do have a journal I am using to write about my missions trip.

Last night I met up with a few friends to celebrate my girls birthday. And we talked about her experience. She told me that she came back grateful for everything she has.

“You come back a changed person”, she said.

If there is one thing I am looking for its clarity.

I’ve wondered far too long to know and understand why I’d be given a desire to design and impact people’s lives to not do anything worthwhile with it.

So If you come to this blog after Friday, and you see no posts – just know I am writing analog, daily- while on my missions trip.

Birthday Surprises

I was feeling salty.

Someone came up to me and asked me to sign a birthday card.

I signed it and wished the person a happy birthday. Yet all I thought about was me. My birthday was also last month. I didn’t get a card. ::sigh::

Oh well right?

It was time to leave and my Pastor Cousin wanted to ask me about the missions trip I have coming up (I leave this Friday), He asked about my expectations and I didn’t really have any. All I know is that it will be hot. How do you gage expectations of a place you’ve only heard extreames? 

But then…. the Leadership Ministry decided to bring out a cake and a birthday card. And I got my own ICE-CREAM CAKE!!!!! It was really a surprise and…..

It was really a surprise and bet – it’s fairly difficult to surprise my nosey ass…

Thank you to my crew.

Y’all are the best. Though we bicker like family we also try to be on the lookout for one another. 

Leadership, especially in the church setting is difficult and requires much sacrifice.

Thank you – I appreciate you.

Now I know I shouldn’t eat this all by myself….. who wants ice cream cake? 



I’d like to think this is highly linked with confidence. Any time we step out into something new doubt also

We are well into the middle of january and I’m curious to know where your mindset is.
For the longest time I’ve dealing with self doubt – questioning my skill level and wondering ” Am I worth it it?” or am i good enough? Do you ever find yourself asking these questions? or feeling that you are some imposter posing to be better than you actually are? From the begining I’ve let you- my subscribers know that I will be truthful and honest with what I am dealing with and going through.
This is my experience in dealing with self-doubt.
It’s crippling and prevents you from moving forward.
Prevents you from being committed to what you started.
Can come from comparing yourself to other people’s work.
I was so focused on myself and couldn’t get past my own insecurities.
Rather than constantly consuming, start to create more stuff – which is what I’ve started doing.
Practice learning from other people.
Be open about what you are struggling

With like I just did in this post.
What I’ve done to practice overcoming this struggle:
Simple stop caring what other people think. Better yet stop assuming I know what other people think.
I must admit I’m ivercoming this in many areas and I’m choosing to move forward boldly.

How to find an accountability partner

(How to find one)
Values must align

recgnize the difference between each person

there are levels – be sure they are 1-2 above you 
Who do I know that I can talk to about these goals and new ideas that I have – that is already in my network. 

What goes down in an accountability meeting: 

A meeting is conducted like this:

Mutually beneficial ( a mentor is one way, be ready to compensate financially)

begin with the last meetings minuets 

it has to be regular (daily, approximately an hour).

it has to be scheduled

it has to be structured 

be sure to take physical notes

be friendly and be human

don’t waste time

what are you struggling with right now

what are you working on by the next time we talk

write down commitments (vise versa)
know that Its something that I owe my ap 

reset if commitments aren’t met

think: what will I do next time. 

be realistic with the goals.
have 10 days on the log or we are done. (mentor-ship style)

Talk about attention grabbers 

Yesterday I had my weekly meet up with my accountability partner! 

As I walked from my car to the cafe couldn’t help but notice the writing on the wall…. 

sure I’m into lettering but I saw in red and all caps before I die I want to——– fill in the blank. 

Of course this got my brain rolling. 

If you look closely get married was a top aspiration. 

All that came to mind immediately was live.  I want to live a fulfilled life with purpose, and joy, and love before I leave this earth. I want to do the best work I can with amazing people. 

I want to visit the Grand Canyon 

Go skydiving

Own and run a successful design business. 

Publish a book. 

Travel the world. 

Before you die- what would you like to do? 

My Life is Boring

I used to believe my life was boring. But then I realized I was probably just not sharing the most interesting and conflicting parts of my life. No one likes bland spaghetti. It has to have the right sauce on top, similarly, no one likes a story without a plot, there has to be some climax that happens along with tension.

One goal I wanted to accomplish this year was to write for 365 days. A few people asked if I was trying to become a writer. The answer is no, however, I’d love to write a book someday. I just wanted to get better at telling stories.

I’ve found that in order to tell an interesting story, you need to be listening to those around you, or travel. Afterall most of our learning from the past is from storytelling. There must be some reason we are still captivated by it to this day.

Theater, dramma, and tv series thrive off of re-enacting great stories told and written by dead men. 

While I know my life isn’t boring, I’ve learned it’s all about finding and interesting  and compelling story – sharing an entry point and captivating part and exchanging it with other people. 

What’s your life’s story?