I remember I would hear it all the time. “You need to change your mindset”. I’ve come to realize what they really meant. What they are saying is you need to change your perspective and see things from a different angle.
One thing for certain is that change is inevitable. We see it in the natural world, in people, plants, geography and even in our workplace. The world is a forever changing place. Its marked all throughout history – yet its still very difficult to adapt and embrace change.
I saw it in myself that change was difficult by taking a leadership role within my church. Currently, I am the president of the singles ministry and we have people that are married, single, dating, and some that are very opinionated. This is all dandy and fine but I found in the beginning, that I would argue with people during discussions, trying to make them side with my point and my perspective. That is not a way to lead! People have their own experiences, expectations and opinions and we don’t always know what lead them to what they believe.
We forget that our experiences and interactions with people of all different backgrounds and lifestyles are the very thing that shapes what we believe. The environment we grow up in, even the stories were hear of places we’ve never traveled shape our mindset and beliefs.
Yesterday I was listening to a podcast about “the Case For Optimism” and there was a story in there about a woman who was legally blind without glasses. Her mother and father never told her about her vision but instead built her confidence through rigorous activities. She mentioned how she loved speed and was going for a regular eye check up before she could get her drivers license and it was then that she learned she was blind, that her vision was abnormal. If you listen to the podcast you’ll learn more in depth about her story and the struggle but in the end she learned if you believe you can or can’t – you’re right.
Choosing to change your mindset and taking actions to make things happen are two different things, but belief that things can change is also part of the equation.
I remember sharing that I wanted to be debt free with my coworkers while working at the bank. They looked at me like I was crazy, they told me debt was inevitable, and that you’ll always have debt. Hello – I’m working at a bank (or at least I was). I see people with thousands of dollars, and very few with millions. I’d also see many tapping onto the “credit” line because they had an emergency.
When I interned with the Impact Movement in 2010, that was the first time I’d learned about Dave Ramsey Financial Peace University. If I was smart then, I’d have listened to what my mentors were telling me and I’d be debt free already. Instead, in 2015 I’d sign up to go through the class with TLCC and I’d work with a good college friend Candice Marie to get me on track to saving and paying down my debt. After listening to these peoples advice and learning that there are a ton of resources out there, my mind was set. I am going to be debt free. It’s going to take time, its going to take research, its going to take crafty legal ways to make more money – but I cannot wait to be through with paying off my student loans.
To any student going to college, please, please, please find alternative ways to pay for your education. The loans aren’t worth it. They hang over your head, and block the clarity you are attempting to seek. Get the scholarships – better yet land the job you want without going to school. Intern, and see if its what you really want to be doing.
Towards the end of August, my business coach had me make a list of three mantra’s to recite to myself every morning. At first I heard mantra and I googled the term to see what it meant.
nounnoun: mantra; plural noun: mantras
- (originally in Hinduism and Buddhism) a word or sound repeated to aid concentration in meditation.
- a Vedic hymn.
- a statement or slogan repeated frequently.
I realize it’s to change my mindset, to change the stories I’ve been telling myself, to remove the false narratives that creep into my mind when my defense mechanism goes into overload.
- the things that happen to me do not define me.
- I can endure and persevere – I’m built for it.
- I do not have a bad attitude – I can prove it.
I’ve paired my mantra with biblical verses, with the help of my boyfriend. After the first two weeks it began to make sense.
At first I felt weird saying these things – out lout, to myself, early in the morning. I didn’t get the point as to why my coach would have me saying these things. She wanted me to get that I had to change my mindset. At that time, these were the very things I was struggling with. I can’t set goals and not expect obstacles to come in the way. Otherwise no one will care about the story. The struggle is worth it and its okay if goals change, your mindset just needs to stretch and grow with it.
Be weary of the false narratives that people share. Make smarter decisions and get over those mental blocks. It can happen, you just need to change your mindset.